As my baby girl gets older, (she just had a birthday July 17) I am beginning to think about my options as she makes her way to 18. If you are the parent of a special needs child who is 13 and up, I encourage you to do begin thinking about it as well.
There is so much to consider. Do you want to have full
responsibility and guardianship over your son or daughter? If you do, it may be
harder to accomplish that than you think. In many states you must almost have
your child declared incompetent, which for most of us, will be near impossible
to do. If you do have complete control, will you be on the hook for anything they may do (liability in a car accident, if they have an argument or altercation with a neighbor, etc).
In Florida (and some other states) there is something called
Guardianship Advocacy. This allows you to assist your child in making decisions
after they become an adult and will restrict certain things they would be
allowed to do without your consent, but you do not have complete legal control
over your child.
Wading through these decisions will take the assistance of a
lawyer very well versed in the field. I would also recommend talking with a
lawyer regarding social security and disability benefits. When your child turns 18, the law says he or
she is an adult and can make their own decisions – no matter how ill prepared
they may be. When my daughter turns 18, she may have the maturity level of
13-year-old. How is she ever going to be able to take care of her own business?
Let’s say for example, she gets upset with me on the way to a doctor’s visit
and innocently says, “I am upset with mommy and I don’t want her to come in
with me.” I won’t be allowed to be a part of her visit or know what changes to
meds may have been made. Well, with a child like mine, by the end of the visit,
whatever she was upset about is over, but that won’t matter.
Raising a special needs child is a challenge and I have to
say that the older she gets, the more complicated it becomes. Taking her into
adulthood isn’t going to be easy but hopefully starting early will give me some
piece of mind.
As I start this new journey, I will be sure to keep you
posted and share what I’ve learned. In the meantime, if you live in Florida,
take a look at this website: http://flcourts18.org/PDF/gurardianship_rev1-07.pdf
It hasn’t been updated since 2007 but it will get you
started.
